I'm half-way out,.. recieved a yellow ticket, next time I'm gonna be out.
Looks like I kept talking and giving advices, but I got carried away. Just like driving a 5-speed car; going on the first gear and trying to reach 65 mph, before you know it, the engine gonna blow up.
"Slow down, relax and observe. There's a lot to be observed before you proceed. Hold on, revise the Statement of Purpose, make sure you know what you're doing and achieving what should be achieved"*. Yeah right. As if it's that easy.
I've got a new friend; my To Do List. She's so lovely and spontaneous. She's straight and up to the point. But sometimes she gets boring when she becomes demanding. I tend to ignore her some times, but she keeps on repeating herself over and over again till I obey.
Funny how I hated to be told what to do, but now that's the only way that works! I lost control over my memory, I ruin everything by forgetting what I HAD to do. Like the time when I forget to pay the rent and the other time when I forgot to call and cancel a business appointment. That could be dangerous sometimes. I don't want to ruin my life that early, so I had to get me this sweet friend.
I hope we don't fight soon and I end up throwing her in the To Sort Later Pile.
Somthing is wrong with me. That's not new. I know. But one thing isn't right this time, which is ME. Again, not new, but I'm just clueless. I'm sure I'm not who I am. I'm just turning into a different person, with different taste and different attitude. Or maybe that's part of me. Maybe that's just the way things are, and I am just who I am. I want my life back.
I feel like lost in nowhere. In a scary world. No, in an even more scary place; lost in my own delusion... I need to sleep.
